Always Be Humble and Kind

NO- this post is not about the song--HAHA...but the title just fit!

Last Sunday our pastor preached on Pride...It was an awesome sermon, and it sparked a long week of thinking about how pride is such a sneaky sucker! So many times satan uses pride to destroy a marriage, and we don't even realize it until it's too late! It sneaks into our daily lives and keeps us from doing the things that God has called us to do in our marriage...men and women alike! 

Let's look at what pride looks like in a marriage:

• Not asking forgiveness when you know you were wrong
• Not telling your spouse when they hurt you because "they should already know"
• Not admitting our mistakes
• Feeling like and acting like all problems are the result of someone else's mistakes
• Not taking suggestions from our spouse because we "have all the answers" and know how to handle this better than they do
• Never admitting we are wrong--even on the smallest things
• Not being willing to learn or grow or change

Proverbs 16:18 says: "Pride comes before destruction, and an arrogant spirit before a fall."

WE HAVE ALL DONE WRONG...WE HAVE ALL MADE MISTAKES...

WE ALL HAVE THINGS WE NEED TO CHANGE ABOUT OURSELVES

Proverbs 11:2 says: "When pride comes, disgrace follows, but with humility comes wisdom."

Proverbs 29:23 says: "A person's pride will humble him, but a humble spirit will gain honor."

HUMILITY: the state if being humble, a modest view of one's own importance; meekness; lack of pride, lack of vanity; submissiveness

In Mark 7, Jesus was talking to the disciples about a parable that He had just told the people. He told them that nothing that goes into the body can defile them (they were talking about food) because it goes into their stomach (not their heart) and is eliminated.  He explained that it is what comes out of people's heart that defiles them. He then gives a long list of things that we all look down upon: evil thoughts, sexual immoralities, theft, murder, adultery, greed, evil actions, deceit, promiscuity, stinginess, blasphemy, PRIDE, and foolishness. 

Mark 7:23 says: "All these evil things come from within and defile a person." YIKES!!

So here's my take away from this...this list includes things that make us all turn our noses up and shake our heads when we hear of someone doing them...so why is pride any different?? We don't think of pride as a detestable and disgusting sin...but Jesus included it in the SAME LIST as all of those sins. SO IT MUST BE JUST AS IMPORTANT TO CHRIST! 

So how do we fix it? How do we lose the pride and change our marriages for the better?

• PRAY HARD and ask the Lord to reveal in you all of your prideful ways.
• ASK FORGIVENESS from God and your spouse.
• GET IN THE WORD daily and study what a Christian life/marriage should look like
• ASK YOUR SPOUSE TO HELP YOU and keep you accountable. We are never going to ARRIVE at the perfect Christian life or marriage...so we need people who love us to help keep us accountable for our actions...in a loving way. Say it with love and a humble spirit/heart. 
• BE WILLING to grow and change. The biggest part of a Christian life and "walk" is to do just that...WALK...MOVE FORWARD...don't stand still and get stagnant. You have to move, walk, study, and pray. The Lord won't sanctify us (make us holy and set us apart) if we are not moving forward toward Him. 
• WALK WITH THE WISE-choose your friends wisely--Proverbs 13:20 says: "The one who walks with the wise will become wise, but a companion of fools will suffer harm." If you are always with people who don't value their marriage, who talk down to or about their spouses, or who never admit when they are wrong...you will most likely do the same...whether you realize it or not. Walk with the wise! Keep good company! 
• HUSBANDS VALUE YOUR SPOUSE'S THOUGHTS AND OPINIONS because you are NEVER always right. I joke with my husband when I tell him something and he disagrees, and then it actually comes to fruition. I used to say "Rule #1" which was--"your wife is always right." Rule #2 was "Always remember Rule #1." We joke about it, but it is farthest from the truth. I make mistakes daily...BUT HUSBANDS...The Lord says that your spouse is your help mate...and I do believe that God has given some women an intuition that men don't have...so value her opinion and at least listen to her thoughts. 
• WIVES RESPECT YOUR HUSBAND'S DECISIONS because God has made him the head of the house. Being submissive is an ugly word now...but it really only means to let him handle it! **I say this a lot and try to live by it: My husband is responsible for our family and how it is run. The bible says that husbands are the head of the house-which means HE IS THE ONE WHO WILL HAVE TO ANSWER FOR HIS DECISIONS REGARDING OUR FAMILY AND HOME....So let him make them. I will DEFINITELY give my thoughts, opinions, and tell him what I feel like God is saying to me about a topic. BUT, in the end, EVEN if he disagrees with me and does the opposite of what I say...If he can lay his head down at night and feel confident that he has done the right thing...THAT IS BETWEEN HIM AND GOD! 
• BE PATIENT with your spouse. None of us are perfect and never will be...so help them realize when they are wrong IN A LOVING WAY, but realize that we are no better than they are...we may just struggle with a different sin than they do.